Dating

Teen Dating- The Essential Guide

Dating as a teenager isn’t the easiest thing to do. While you are growing up and
maturing, there are many things out there that you may not understand. You also
still have a lot to learn. Dating can be stressful regardless of your age, but dating
as a teen can be more difficult in many instances. Here’s some great advice to
think about to help you out as you start to date.

How To Tell If They Like You

The first step in dating is to figure out if the person you are interested in is also
interested in you. Sometimes there are hints you can use to find out if they like
you. If they always seem to find an excuse to talk to you, if they switch classes to
share a few with you, or if they start to show an interest in music or activities that
you enjoy, then they may be interested.

Can A Girl Ask A Guy Out?

Many teens struggle with this. Guys may be too shy to make the initial move
of asking the girl out, so the girl wants to jumpstart the relationship. There is
absolutely nothing wrong with asking him out. Just be sure you aren’t overly
assertive, and keep it simple. If he has expressed interest in going to an arcade
or seeing a certain movie, you can ask him by approaching it as though you
already had plans to do that. For instance, tell him you were going to hang out
at the arcade over the weekend, then ask if you will see him there. This way you
don’t come across as too aggressive, and it leaves the ball in his court.

What Are Good Dates For Teens?

Going on dates as a teenager can present a challenge. You don’t want to do
anything too grown up, but you still want to spend time alone and have fun.
Roller skating, bowling, arcades, swimming, and mini golf are all good ideas,
but if he suggest a Swinging date,
its not a good idea.
Try to avoid anything that will require a lot of money, or will require a lot of driving for
your parents. Also don’t be surprised if your parent wants to chaperon if you are
a younger teen. You can ask your parent to keep their distance if this is an issue.

What If I’m Not Having Fun

If you find yourself on a date that is less than exciting, or you have a strange
feeling about it, never hesitate to leave. If you drove, tell them you need to go
and offer to take them home. If your parents drove, or they drove, call your
parents or a friend to pick you up. When you are dating you need to learn to trust
your instincts, and if something doesn’t feel right, trust that and leave.

Am I In Love?

Teens tend to mix up love for other emotions, as love is a relatively new feeling
to them. If you think you are in love, you should stop and ask yourself a few
questions before professing this. Are you able to see past their imperfections,
or do some things they do still make you crazy? Once you fall in love you will
be able to look beyond some of the things that drove you nuts when you first
met them. Do you feel like you can share anything with them? If so, you may be
experiencing a first love. Many teens say their first love was also their best friend.

Healthy Relationships

Even as a teenager being able to distinguish between a healthy and an
unhealthy relationship will be important. If you don’t learn these skills now, you
may face dating losers for a long time before you can recognize and break the
patterns. A healthy relationship is based on trust. Do you feel that you can be
vulnerable around your date and not worry about being hurt? Someone who truly
loves you is going to take a step back before a fight starts, and will be there for
you when you need a friend. Is your boyfriend/girlfriend willing to allow you to
hang out with their friends? In a healthy relationship a partner won’t try to hide
you from others. Do they get angry if you hang out with your friends? Jealousy
can be a problem in relationships of all ages, but is especially a problem for
teens. In a healthy relationship you will have the freedom to hang out with your
friends without your date blowing up your phone or getting angry.

Warning Signs to Look For

Teenagers aren’t immune to violence and bad relationships. In fact, the problem
is compounded by the fact that many teenagers have no idea what is normal in
a relationship and what isn’t. If you spot any of these warning signs you should
stop dating that person, and possibly ask an adult for help with the situation.

-They are nice in person but ignores you or makes fun of you around their
friends. This is just a mean person who is trying to get something from you when
no one else is around, but then doesn’t want to admit they are in a relationship.
You deserve better than this.

-They pressure you to do things you don’t want to do. It’s not normal or healthy
in any way for someone to try to guilt you in to doing something you don’t want
to do. This doesn’t just refer to sex, or meeting Swingers, it can be anything.
In a healthy relationship your boyfriend/girlfriend will respect your wishes and will be willing to make
compromises to appease both of you.

-They have a problem with drugs or alcohol. If this is the case, run away from this
person. Teens who use drugs or drink are unpredictable. You also don’t want to
end up getting involved in this yourself, or getting in to trouble just by hanging out
with them.

-They have been violent. If they have ever hit a wall around you, punched a
locker, or worse, hurt you in any way, this is NOT normal or healthy. In these
cases you need to have an adult help you get out of the situation. Don’t try
to just leave on your own, and never keep this information from anyone. It’s
not anything to be ashamed about, the person who is abusive is the one who
should feel shame. You can talk to a school counselor or a teacher if you aren’t
comfortable going to your parents.

-They pressure you for sex. This is also never acceptable. Sex is something that
should be mutual, and should be enjoyed. However, many teens try to jump in to
this not realizing how serious it is. You have to worry about pregnancy, sexually
transmitted diseases, and deep emotions. If you aren’t ready, then stick to that.
Don’t allow anyone else to tell you otherwise. If they tell you that you will do it if
you love them, just remember that if they loved you they wouldn’t be asking.